The crack of the whip
rings in the air. A gasp escaped from the lips of the bruised and now bloody
man’s back
My greed.
The whip cracks again.
My bitterness.
The blood from His
back splatters those standing close.
Again the whip cruelly lies open His back.
My hatred.
Crack. The blood sprays their faces.
My lust.
Crack. The blood
splatters their clothes.
My selfishness.
Crack. The blood is in their hair and on their feet.
My jealousy.
Finally, He’s thrown to the blood soaked ground. Only to struggle through town with a
rough-hewn beam thrust on His shredded back.
Each step a struggle amidst a mocking crowd.
My drunkenness.
At the top of the
hill to the joy and delight of the crowd He’s thrown down on top of the rough
beam and the nails are lined-up on the wrists and the hammer raised. The thud of the hammer rings out amidst the
cries of agony.
My gluttony.
His body twists in a
jolt of blinding pain as the crowd cheers the thud of the hammer.
My lies.
Thud.
My gossiping.
Thud.
My hypocrisy.
The blood was splattered liberally around the ravaged body
of the Man. It was sprinkled on
all who drew near.
It’s far easier to
step to the back of the crowd and look the other way. My inability to live, as
I should is far less noticeable the farther back in the crowd I stand. If I just look the other way, why, I can see
that I’m certainly not as bad as those others over there. It’s much more neat and orderly back
here. Not so messy. Cleanliness is next
to godliness, you know. I’m sure if I
just get busy enough that nagging emptiness that snuck up on me will go away.
Back here I can mark
my sin up to only being human and my unanswered prayers as “it must not have
been God’s will”. My flesh’s attempt to
deny that the Lord is my righteousness and that He promised to answer when I
pray will keep me neat, orderly, and in control instead of bloody.
What is this about
the Holy Spirit wanting to be in control and that He wars against my flesh? War
is not neat, orderly, or nice. I hate
this flatness; this emptiness in my life.
What to do, what to
do?
Do I dare trust Him
to win the war?
This emptiness bleeds the life from my soul.
The war begins as I decide to draw near and be
splattered by the Blood; I look into His eyes and cry out in agony “I’m
unworthy of this sacrifice!” Oh, how it
rips and shreds my pride and arrogance.
It reveals my absolute nakedness and filth. How can my flesh stand this! It can’t.
It dies. And I weep for I have always
had this flesh beside me to guide me.
Those
nail pierced hands gently cup my face to draw my gaze upward. It is frightening! How can I endure such pain again! But the hands are so gentle as they wipe away
the tears. I give His face a quick glance.
How can it be? With all the
exposure of my wicked sin there should be wrath and anger. My sin is so ugly and caused so much pain. So what was that look on His face. He didn’t appear to be angry. Perhaps I should look again. Oh, no! What do I do? This kindness, this love on His face, could it
be for me? How could He love me when I’m
so ugly? Again those gentle hands draw
me up on to His lap and He rests my head against His chest. And as He cradles me in His lap I think,
“Perhaps…could this be…love?”
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To
all those that are weary, burdened and hunger for more, come and we will go on
a journey to find Life and life abundantly.
After I read your blog yesterday (very good, btw), I heard this song on the way to Helena and it seemed so appropriate :)
ReplyDeleteYou Love Me Anyway (Sidewalk Prophets)
The question was raised
As my conscience fell
A silly, little lie
It didn’t mean much
But it lingers still
In the corners of my mind
Still you call me to walk
On the edge of this world
To spread my dreams and fly
But the future’s so far
My heart is so frail
I think I’d rather stay inside
But You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
Yes You love me anyway
Oh Lord, how You love me
How You love me
It took more than my strength
To simply be still
To seek but never find
All the reasons we change
The reasons I doubt
And why do loved ones have to die?
But You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
Yes You love me anyway
Oh Lord, how You love me
{ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/s/sidewalk-prophets-lyrics/you-love-me-anyway-lyrics.html }
I am the thorn in Your crown
But You love me anyway
I am the sweat from Your brow
But You love me anyway
I am the nail in Your wrist
But You love me anyway
I am Judas’ kiss
But You love me anyway
See now, I am the man who yelled out from the crowd
For Your blood to be spilled on this earth shaking
ground
Yes then, I turned away with a smile on my face
With this sin in my heart tried to bury Your grace
And then alone in the night, I still called out for You
So ashamed of my life, my life, my life
But You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
Yes,You love me anyway
Oh Lord, how You love me
You love me, yes You love me
How You love me
How You love me
How You love me